FEBRUARY 2025 WAS A MOVIE
I wrote about evil, complicated women, who once were overlooked, abused girls. Valentine's Day was romantic, but I didn't experience any romance.
WAS A MOVIE is the recap of my life lately, the movies I watched, and the bits that made my life feel cinematic.
February was a whirlwind, y’all. I went ham on SENSUAL TERRORS. I was open and transparent; I was weird and unloveable; I was cranky and bitchy and horny and talked my shit.
And it paid off. I surpassed 100 subscribers — not counting the 15 friends I imported to my mailing list. (Hey, boo!)
I also got my first paid subscriber!
And met lots of wonderful women and non-binary people, who are just as nerdy and idiosyncratic and horror-obsessed as I am.
I took a well-deserved step back from Instagram to curb my addiction, while also expanding my SENSUAL TERRORS social media presence across platforms: Instagram, Threads, Tumblr and Reddit.
I also reminded the hard way that community-building outside of Substack is a mixed bag.
On one hand: The “Lynchpins” on Threads have been so nice.
They always think I’m funny and that’s been how I’ve been getting the most mutuals on that platform lately.
An unexpectedly sweet moment came when I quoted someone else’s post about Lynch movies. I asked people to divulge their zodiac sign + favorite Lynch project.
Not only was the OP a good sport about it, but I got sooo many answers.
Meanwhile, I mentioned this on r/Letterboxd in passing and got my first downvote deluge.
I took off my earrings and had my first Reddit catfight.
A man did his best to insult my intelligence and tell me I lacked intelligence. I took the bait because I had time that day. (Don’t worry, I only get into one Internet fight a year.)
I told him he was mean. He implied it was OK to be mean because I was stupid. He tried to make astrology the hill that I would die on. I told him that I don’t take it any more seriously than I do MBTI and that was the only thing that shut him up.
Likewise, I also finally got the courage to make my Letterboxd username my flair and people had something to say about it.
FUCK Y’ALL. I haven’t watched an Adam Driver movie in years — besides the Burberry centaur ad — and my libido is non-existent.
If I have to wear my Letterboxd username as a scarlet letter, so be it.1
Movies I mentioned in my Substack posts this month
Saltburn, dir. Emerald Fennell
Eileen, dir. William Oldroyd
The Lobster, dir. Yorgos Lanthimos
FOE, dir. Garth Davis
Last Night in Soho, dir. Edgar Wright
The Favourite, dir. Yorgos Lanthimos
Bones and All, dir. Luca Guadagnino
Belle de Jour, dir. Luis Bunuel2
Possession, dir. Andrzej Żuławski
Marriage Story, dir. Noah Baumbach
Rosemary’s Baby, dir. 🍅🍅🍅
Hellraiser, dir. Clive Barker
The Omen, dir. Richard Donner
The First Omen, dir. Arkasha Stevenson
Nosferatu, dir. Robert Eggers
Us, dir. Jordan Peele
Candyman, dir. Bernard Rose (also, it’s a crying shame Tony Todd got left out of the Oscars in memoriam segment; his widow is understandably upset)
Candyman, dir. Nia DaCosta
Eve’s Bayou, dir. Kasi Lemmons (and fun fact, Kasi is one of the stars of the 92 Candyman!)
Movies I watched this month that I didn’t write about on Substack
Promising Young Woman, dir. Emerald Fennell
Eraserhead, dir. David Lynch
David Lynch: The Art Life, dir. Jon Nguyen, Rick Barnes & Olivia Neergaard-Holm
Lost Highway, dir. David Lynch
Movie moment: The comfort of something to hold
Building on last month’s convo about physical media…
JANUARY 2025 WAS A MOVIE
WAS A MOVIE is the recap of my life lately, the movies I watched, and the bits that made my life feel cinematic.
See: Crate-digging, solo dates, nostalgic euphoria care of Joint Custody, in Takoma, Maryland.
I’ve been mooning over a few discs in from the Criterion Collection. But as someone who plans to move, I’m simply bookmarking a few things for later.
And as someone who needs to pinch pennies for the move, I’ve been delighted when God surprises me with some free items for my archive.3
One of my prized possessions is a Curzon Cinema mini zine, that I picked up in the lobby of the theater when I studied abroad in London. Killing of a Sacred Deer, the movie I had rubbed a few queen-faced coins together to see that night, was the cover star.
A new, gratefully held souvenir came when I spent the night marveling at the beautiful people in the Lower East Side’s Metrograph movie theatre. When I got my ticket sorted, I picked up one of the Valentine’s Day-themed pins available to Metrograph members.
After watching Posession, which was an experience I’ll never forget for all the wrong reasons, I still wasn’t ready to go home yet.4
I walked upstairs to the Commissary, the famed restaurant attached to the cinema. I didn’t get a chance to eat there on this trip — I severely mismanaged my time and I’m pretty sure it had been booked up for Valentine’s Day anyway. (That didn’t contribute to my bitterness at all or anything.)
After midnight, the upstairs joint was beyond closed.
But the Lynchian femme fatale sitting side-saddle in a barstool — dynamic blonde shoulder-length hair; a Pomodoro red halter dress; a pair of sharply-colored 40s style pumps — had the closing shift’s rapt attention.
I took a few selfies in the murky mirror by the hostess stand, and vowed to eat here one day.
Poking around to see if there were any beautiful details I missed, I found a stack of Metrograph zines.
I tucked one into my cherry red satchel bag and dragged myself across the Brooklyn bridge. Reflecting on this moment, I noticed a synchronicity in my life.
Long before last month’s Portishead record and the Metrograph zine, it was my well-worn CD player for my elementary school bus commute. Then it was the iPod nano I fell asleep clutching each night in middle school. Then it was the iPod Touch that introduced me to my sex drive and death drive as repressed, deeply Catholic high schooler.
When I’m deeply alone in life, physical media keeps me company when no one can.
My luck turned around when people still took me seriously and followed me during the name-drop thread this past Sunday anyway.
The fact that this film is de Jour instead of du Jour has been driving me clinically insane, by the way.
By the way, I can’t stop thinking about
’s call-to-action: “Create your personal archive, offline.” Similarly, I recommend ’s guide to building a personal archiving practice.I loved the Metrograph theater because it was so beautiful and sexy, but the people in my screening had no home training. More on that later..
Wonderful read. Thank you for sharing your perspective on these topics.